Author: Chantal Murphy, Founder
Why Your Baby Wakes Soon As You Put Them Down
One of the most common sleep difficulties we encounter are babies and toddlers who are heavily reliant on mum and dad to feed, rock, pat or even drive them to sleep.
When your baby becomes drowsy while being fed, held, patted or bounced, they are in the process of transitioning into a light stage of sleep. After about 10-15 minutes, they move into a deep sleep, their breathing becomes shallow, and they become still and floppy.
We then gently place them down in their cot and sneak out of the room, Unfortunately, this is short-lived and will only last 20 minutes during the day and if you are lucky two up to 2 – 3 hours at night.
The deep stage of sleep generally lasts 20 minutes or so before they transition again into a lighter phase of sleep; babies at that point will either move into another sleep cycle on their own, OR they will wake to check their surroundings.
Babies will fully waken if anything has changed from when they went to sleep (a valuable survival mechanism). So, if they have been patted, fed or rocked to sleep, they will require the same process multiple times over for them to fall back to sleep.
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When can I teach my baby to self-settle?
Once your child is between four to five months of age, self-settling becomes an essential skill if you want your child to be able to do longer stretches of sleep through the night along with better day naps.
Tips for self-settling!
- Follow an age-appropriate routine, and ensure your baby is not becoming overtired; any settling attempts will be unsuccessful with an overtired baby.
- Introduce positive sleep associations. A comforter is my #1 go to, this will help replace YOU as their primary sleep association. You can also introduce wind downtime like offering a massage or reading a book.
- Optimise the room environment. A dark room signals the brain to release the sleep hormone (melatonin) and helps avoid stimulation. Most babies will experience early rising and find it difficult to resettle if they are cold, so maintaining a room temperature between 19-22 degrees is ideal.
- Bring bedtime forward. Many babies fall asleep on the breast or bottle because they are overtired. A bedtime between 6:30 pm -7:30 pm is ideal for most ages. If you are still finding your child is falling asleep prematurely, try bringing feeding times forward.
- Always put your baby down to sleep drowsy but awake to encourage self-settling. All babies wake overnight, the difference being their reliance on you to get back to sleep, or whether they have the skills to fall back to sleep on their own.
- Ensure your baby is FULL. There is no point trying to encourage self-settling if your baby is due for a feed or has not eaten/fed well during the day.
- Reduce your intervention. If you find you are unable to place your child in the cot without feeding, patting or movement; that is ok, avoid these actions until your baby is completely asleep. Be persistent with laying them down when they are still drowsy, and over a few days/weeks, you can gently reduce the amount of intervention you are doing.
- Swaddling - For babies under six months: 0 - 14 weeks swaddle for sleep or as long as possible (until they can roll). 14weeks - 6 months try tucking them in tight at nap and sleep times. This makes them feel safe, secure and has been proven to help them sleep longer.
- Choose your timing wisely. Choose a time you can commit to this process when you have support. Try to avoid going out (at night) for a period of 10 days - 2 weeks to give your baby the best chance possible to learn their new skill.
- Persistency & Consistency is key. Be sure to do the same for day and night sleeps and persist for at least a week. Babies are fast learners and more adaptable than we give them credit for, once given a chance - they may surprise you!.
The Baby Sleep Magic App will help your baby get a full nights sleep within days or your money back, Download today
